Introduction
Emotions shape daily life. People experience joy, sadness, anger, and fear. How a person responds to these feelings impacts their mental and spiritual well-being. Many people think patience means hiding emotions or staying silent. This leads to confusion between patience and suppression. Psychology suggests that hiding emotions can negatively impact mental health. Islam raises sabr as a virtue that strengthens the heart.
True patience does not deny emotions. It guides them in a balanced and responsible
way that pleases Allah ﷻ.
Psychology sees suppression as keeping emotions hidden away (Gross, 1998). Studies
show that it increases stress, weakens memory, and relates to anxiety and depression (Hu et al., 2014). Healthier strategies include acceptance and rethinking the situation.
Islam provides a similar approach. Allah ﷻ praises the patient and promises His
support (Qur’an 2:153).
The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said, “Real strength is controlling oneself in anger, not physical force” (al-Bukhari, Muslim).
This shows that sabr is strength, trust, and discipline, not something against you.
Many Muslims feel pressured to look strong by hiding their feelings. Yet the Prophets
did not hide their emotions. They expressed grief and fear while staying firm in faith.
Prophet Yaqub عليه السلام cried for years over Yusuf (May Allah be pleased with him)
but kept his trust in Allah ﷻ (Qur’an 12:86). The Prophet ﷺ wept when his son
Ibrahim passed away and said the heart feels sorrow, but the tongue speaks what
pleases Allah ﷻ (Al-Bukhari, 20:3120). These examples show emotions are part of being human. Islam teaches regulation, not suppression.
This article highlights the difference between patience and suppression through Islamic
teachings, psychological research, and real-life examples. It argues that suppression
harms the mind and body. Patience builds resilience and strengthens faith.
Suppression in Psychology
Suppression is a conscious effort to hold back emotional expression. People sometimes do this to avoid conflict or appear strong. Research shows that suppression harms mental, physical, and social health.
Large studies show that suppression predicts higher stress and lower well-being. In a
review, Hu et al. (2014) found that suppression was linked to more negative feelings and lower life satisfaction. Other studies show that suppression reduces social support and relationship quality. When people hide their emotions, they appear withdrawn, and harder to connect with (English & John, 2013).
Suppression also affects the body. Research shows higher heart rate and stronger
stress responses in those who rely on suppression (Aldao & Nolen-Hoeksema, 2013).
Over time, this pattern relates to poorer sleep and higher inflammation. Appleton et al. (2013) found that long-term emotional holding increased health risks.
Medical research shows similar patterns. Cancer patients who suppressed emotions
after diagnosis experienced higher distress than those who expressed their feelings or
processed them with support (Hoyt et al., 2013). These findings show that suppression
delays healing and weakens coping.
Overall, suppression traps emotions and increases distress. It differs from healthier
strategies, for example, acceptance and cognitive reframing, which improve recovery
and emotional balance (Campbell-Sills et al., 2006).
Patience in Islam
Sabr is a central virtue in Islam. Allah ﷻ commands believers to seek His help through patience and prayer (Qur’an 2:153). Sabr is not passive silence. It is active trust,
consistency, and strength during hardship. Ibn al-Qayyim explained three types of sabr:
staying firm in obedience, avoiding sin, and accepting Allah’s ﷻ decree. This shows
that patience involves both inner work and outward action.
The Prophet ﷺ showed patience in every trial. When the people of Ta’if mocked and
harmed him, he responded with prayer for their guidance (al-Bukhari). During the hijrah, when Abu Bakr (May Allah be pleased with him) grew worried in the cave, the Prophet ﷺ reassured him by reminding him that Allah ﷻ is with them (Qur’an 9:40).
Imam al-Ghazali explained that patience does not cancel grief. It guides a person to
stay within the limits of faith. The Prophet ﷺ cried when his son died but avoided
statements that suggest despair or objection to Allah’s ﷻ plan (Al-Bukhari, 20:3120).
Allah ﷻ promises a great reward for those who practice sabr. The Qur’an states that
the patient will receive reward without measure (Qur’an 39:10). Patience turns hardship into spiritual growth. It keeps the believer connected to Allah ﷻ while allowing emotional honesty.
Case Illustrations
Daily life shows the difference between patience and suppression. A student who
receives harsh feedback hides anger and remains silent. This creates inner tension,
followed by stress. Patience would guide the student to acknowledge hurt, control
anger, and respond with calm words. This strengthens character and protects
relationships.
In professional settings, employees often suppress emotions to avoid problems. Over
time, this leads to burnout. Patience encourages a different path. The person reflects, controls reactions and addresses the issue with sincerity. This supports mental health and builds trust.
Patience in Islam and Psychology
Islam teaches patience as a steady effort and trust in Allah. Psychology studies similar
ideas through emotional regulation. Both value self-control. The key difference is in
meaning. Islamic patience focuses on purpose, faith, and moral responsibility.
Psychological suppression focuses on hiding feelings without dealing with them.
Suppression leads to stress. Patience leads to growth.
Prophetic Examples and Personal Reflection
The prophets lived with full emotional honesty. Yaqub عليه السلام cried and grieved,12 yet remained firm. Yusuf عليه السلام faced betrayal and prison but turned to Allah ﷻ. Musa عليه السلام felt burdened by his people yet acted with responsibility. Yunus عليه السلام felt distress inside the whale and called upon Allah ﷻ with sincerity. The Prophet ﷺ experienced loss, pain, and rejection yet stayed patient and expressed emotion in a balanced way.
I reflect on these examples in my own life. I recently lost my aunt and uncle within eight
days while being far from my mother. The grief is heavy. These prophetic stories remind me that sadness does not cancel sabr. Allah acknowledges emotional pain:
“We know your heart is saddened…” (Qur’an 15:97).
I strive to stay honest with my feelings, while
trusting Allah, praying, and seeking strength.
Conclusion
Patience in Islam allows us to show our feelings without falling into despair.
Suppression hides feelings and harms mental and physical health. Islamic teachings and prophetic examples show that true sabr brings strength, healing, and closeness to Allah. Psychology confirms that open and guided emotional regulation supports well-being. By practicing patience through faith, insight, and honest expression, believers handle hardship with resilience and calm.
Written by: Kawtharxh
Edited by: The Editorial Team
© The Islamic Reflections Blog
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